Random Selection Saves The USA!

A Random Selection Process (RSP) can’t be any worse, right?

If one watches Fox News or Newsmax, it’s pretty plain that Joe Biden is the absolute worst president ever. And if not Mr. Biden, the worst was Barack Obama.

If one watches MSNBC or CNN, it will be quite apparent that Donald Trump was the worst possible choice for Chief Executive.

Even if neither view is completely correct, a huge percentage of the American populace believes that our choice of leaders is seriously flawed.

Let us not affix the blame. Let’s fix the problem.

Can we handle the truth? Regardless, here it is. We Americans are too stupid and selfish to pick a competent leader who serves our best interests. And we are too easily swayed in one direction or another by constant media bombardment funded by big money. We are no longer the American People, as politicians are so fond of saying. We are the American Sheeple.

As such, our selections are abysmal. Additionally, the election process is irreparably flawed due to things like the Electoral College, Russian hackers, rogue voting machines, and Gerry Garcia voting by mail. We need to get back on track.

Let’s not expect a twice-rolled ’65 Corvair to run like a brand-new loaded ‘Vette. Why try to fix a poorly designed disaster when you can have a highly effective modern machine?

Simple! We’ll select our president with a random drawing. Here’s how it works:

Selecting a president should never be the dominion of computers. Note that with the Random Selection Process (RSP), there will be NO COMPUTERS involved. There will be no hacking this selection! We don’t need or want computers because we’ve got balls!

With the mechanism of selection in place, we’ll need a TV show. On the first Tuesday following the first Monday in November, we’ll have hours of hoopla and pointless speculation. The ratings will be almost as high as the Super Bowl, and predictions every bit as accurate. The supermarkets will be emptied of beer and chips and dip as everyone prepares for the gatherings prompted by the big event.

Selection night will be an exciting media moment!
(Apologies to Steve Kornacki, who will not be needed.)

It’s a shame Alex Trebek is not available to host. As a naturalized citizen, he would have been a perfect impartial MC, since he had no skin in the game. Maybe Arnold Schwarzenegger could fill in?

Due to the science of statistics, we know that getting another dismal Six Sigma individual for president will have a much lower probability than the results of recent elections. One of us in the middle of the bell-shaped curve is almost assured of the presidency. And that will be a big improvement over those at the edges of the distribution.

No monetary influence until after the “election.” Go pound salt, all you election-influencing Kochs and Soroses. Who you see is who you get.

No more long and pointless debates. No need to pull out, GOP. There will be nothing to pull out of.

No more environmentally unfriendly campaign signs and flags clogging up our yards, our vision, and eventually our garbage cans.

No YEARS of posturing and campaigning for the Office of the President.

The process is completely independent of wealth, influence, race, sex, and, and, and... Anyone can become president!

It’s the American Dream.

No matter how good or bad the new randomly selected president becomes, that person will do us all a great service. After the selection is announced, we’ll all be scratching our heads at the same time, in the same way, wondering what the heck the new and unknown Chief Executive will do.

Unified America will be Great Again!

Sparked by reading posts from the Davids, Martin and Volek.

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