What to do when your child is left behind on a train

Over a recent weekend, while taking the train back from Flushing with my sons, I observed a touristy, older woman almost getting left behind by her family. She was checking her subway map. The other three members were talking to one another. At the Queensboro stop, the three exited the train car, not realizing the woman with the map was not following. Instantly, my mind recalls a similar incident from a couple years ago, but with a much different character playing that role: my four-year old son.

On a subway ride home, we almost left Benji behind upon exiting the train at our stop. The train was fairly full. I had one stroller that sat Benji’s one-year old brother, Dex. My wife had another stroller for Benji himself. It was folded up because he wanted to sit on the subway seat and look out the window on the trip home. When the train arrived at our station, I got up from my seat and made my way out to the left exit with Dex still in his stroller, navigating through a few passengers. I assumed Benji paired up with his mother and followed me out.

I’m on the platform pushing the stroller and then I hear the shriek, “Where’s Benjamin?!” It came from my wife who was looking at me from behind. I turned and saw that she had exited the doors on the right instead. She held only the umbrella stroller.

“He’s still in there!” she shouted. “Benji’s still on the train!”

My head spun to the train. And I see Benji, near the doors where I exited, but clearly still inside. Then I see the doors closing on him, like theater curtains on a performer, only a million times faster. Out of the left corner of my eyes, I see my wife racing towards the doors. I took a step towards the doors as well. But I quickly realized neither one of us was going to get there before the train started moving again, with our son. As quick as the doors were closing, two pairs of hands poked out in between to prevent them from fulling locking. Anyone not familiar with the New York subway system needs to understand these doors don’t behave like typical elevator doors. They don’t open back up on light contact with objects. These doors want to shut. It took a bit of effort from the four hands to finally get the doors to open again. Quickly, my wife grabbed Benji’s hand and pulled him out. Never had I been more grateful for the kindness of strangers.

For a split second I thought I saw a look of abandonment on Benji’s face as he walked onto the platform. In observing him, I thought he understood the gravity of the situation as well. Up until that moment, none of us had been prepared to handle a scenario of a train taking our boy away. In all the times riding the train with my wife and sons, never once did we consider this now-very-real possibility. It’s in my head now.

The woman with the map didn’t have to rely on her own family plan, if she even had one. She made it out at the last second. Perhaps she has one now ready for her next destination.

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